Lesson plans for dating and relationships
I don’t think it’s that guys don’t want to deal with the breakup…I think it’s more that they wouldn’t even know how or where to begin… but if I could go back and tell my 15-year-old self a piece of advice about breakups, it would be, “If you get dumped, just move on right away.To dispel the misconceptions, let’s take a look at some of the universal truths about guys and breakups – some of which may surprise you since they certainly are hidden from the surface. Simple enough to say, but I know plenty of women will talk about how some guy came off like an insensitive jackass after the relationship fell apart because of his actions post-breakup.The fact is: If a guy is profoundly obnoxious or terrible after a breakup, it is most often a testament to how rough the breakup was on him. MORE: 5 Things Every Girl Needs to Know About Guys Jerry Seinfeld once said that breaking up a relationship needs to be like taking off a Band-aid – One motion: OFF!When we believe something that is out of alignment with reality, we suffer…To wrap up this point: Most people can’t recognize when they believe something impossible, nor can they see the false belief as the source for all of the suffering…Maybe he changes his lifestyle, stops hanging out with certain friends, or changes his habits.
When a woman’s relationship ends, she mourns,” or “He’s just hooking up with such-and-such to spite the ex-girlfriend,” or “Guys just don’t care” and other nonsense.Personally, I have had breakups where I pretty much went cold. I wanted her to be OK, I wanted good things for her in life, but I knew that nothing was going to make the situation better.No discussion was going to fix things, no clarity was to be had – it would have just been an emotional toilet for both of us.all they feel is suffering and they want it to end. and honestly, I think all of us, man and woman, have been there at one time or another. It doesn’t mean anything about you, your worth, your attractiveness, your value, etc.Again, all this was said in the context of if they guy was the one who was dumped. I hate to say it, but this is usually a case where the guy wasn’t feeling happy with the relationship for a while and when another opportunity came along, he jumped ship. I don’t have much to say about it, other than that it sucks and that your best move is to move on, get back out there and date new people. It has nothing to do with you, you don’t need to understand, you don’t need closure.
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In the same regard, when a relationship ends, it is much much harder for a guy to go back and discuss and revisit and talk through and explain, etc. In fact, guys like to keep their emotional spectrum focused on a tight range of emotions – somewhere between amusement and contentedness.